The famously charming part about pregnancy (Baby Making -Part 8)

Okay remember the time when I brag about how I’m one of those lucky bitches who don’t have morning sickness and maybe an occasional barf-a-little-no-biggie in the evening?

Yeah, I don’t remember saying that either.

You see, these past few days (which seems like a lifetime) my body has been in cohort with the very same demon that possessed Emily Rose to torment me for bragging too early about this barfing business.

Now, every 9pm - 11pm, you’ll be seeing me dunking my head in the toilet bowl for a full blown party with the stuff from my stomach. Wheee!

Two nights ago, I escaped this messy ritual and I thought, “Hey! Maybe I pass the test and no longer have to suffer!” and before I can utter the words out loud, last night I found myself zooming to the toilet faster than Lightning McQueen can say Ka'chow Ka'ching! I heaved so hard that I peed a little in my pants and the humiliation gets worst as I was making noises as horrific as a T-Rex fucking a wild boar and the whole neighborhood can hear me.

With tears streaking down my face, my hair ‘styled’ ala chainsaw-massacre-had-an-orgy-with-it, sweat, and vomit stench wharfing out of my every pore, I am convinced Michael Bay would NEVER cast me as the next Mikaela Banes or lips-so-full-I-can’t-see-nothing-else-on-face-just-lips-lips-lips Carly Spencer.

There are times I just put my forehead on the toilet rim and slobbering with mucus and sobs because barfing everything inside me feels so horrible. If every female mammals experience this during pregnancy, why I never see my mom’s pregnant cat heaving 24/7 or weeping in her litter box coz her husband was looking at her vomit face and she thinks he thinks her ugly?

Then again, I love all the new experiences! And I’m not complaining. I’m just sharing.




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