Bloooooooooooood! Blooooood! I... Give... Bloood......

I listed donating blood as one of the things I want to do in my life list. All these while I couldn’t donate blood because:

1. My frying pan was heavier than me (39kg! WHAT THE DUCK!)

2. My hemoglobin count was below 12.5 g/dL

3. I don’t want to give what’s mine NYE NYE NYE NYE NYE NYE (Yes, yes I was as childish as a 100 years old tuna can)

4. I keep picturing myself turning into a bat for no apparent reason (I’ve weird imagination you should know that by now)

But this year, when my company organized a blood donation drive, I jumped in to volunteer and at the same time –DONATE MY SUPER PRECIOUS, PRECIOUS GLITTERING YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT RED BLOOD.

Since I was the ONLY one there who NEVER had her blood taken more than a prick, hotdamn, I was given a VIP treatment y’all! The way my colleagues and the blood bank people treated me, you would think that any given time I would either run away like a cowardly bitch or suddenly DIE right in front of their eyes. The more they hover and asked, “Are you okay? How do you feel? Have you had breakfast? No? Here are 500 hard boiled eggs! EAT! EAAAAAAAT! EAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!” And all that BEFORE I EVEN GET MY FINGER PRICK TO CHECK MY HEMOGLOBIN COUNT!

They can’t help it. I’m lovable. Cue to vomit profusely to the nearest exit.

I filled in a form, stated my exact weight now (50.4kg –same weight as a hippo’s thigh) and waited for my turn to get my finger prick for blood check for:

1. Amount of my hemoglobin (Minimum is 12.5 g/dL. Mine was 14.5 g/dL)

2. My blood type (O positive)

3. Whether it’s true my blood glitters like Edward’s deformed left nipple (Sadly it’s not)

Once done, they check my blood pressure and due to all the excitement and nervousness and my ability to eat rocks, the reading came out 100/70. The lady person who saw this was not very happy with the result and for a brief moment, I thought she was going to say “No, you can’t donate blood. But you can donate your nice ass instead” but instead she said, “FUCK THIS! YOU’VE AWESOME BLOOD AND WE WANT IT SO LET’S TAKE EM, BITCH!” I think it goes something like that… I can’t remember exactly what she said (whistling to a Christmas song)

So I sat down on a nice reclining chair and a guy came and asked me to relax as he did all what was needed to be done and next thing you know, wow… my blood… was… not glittering. How de-fuckin-lighted.

Took a while though to fill in a small bag. I kept squeezing a PVC pipe that they asked me to squeeze with the arm they just punctured with one huge-ass needle, hoping my blood would pour out like a fountain but nothing close to that ever happen sorry to disappoint myself. I had a big expectation like maybe the blood tube suddenly burst and splatter people around me with my magical blood and heal their financial problem and I would be hail as the king of the world but yeah, didn’t happen. Dis-fucking-pointed. Again.

After they took all my blood and left me all dried up with only my skin and bones to support my life… (KIDDING!) I rested a bit then got up and expected a world-whirl of dizziness but na’ah nothing like that happen. Only after a while that I felt tired and sleepy. I thought it was because it was near lunch time (I usually take a short nap during lunch) but it lasted the rest of the day and that night, by 8:30pm, I was snoring up a storm.

I hope my blood is healthy enough to be used by those in need. Even if it does not glitter.

Later days!



Copyright © Balqiz 2012 | All rights reserved | Blog Design by Krafty Palette.