Goodbye Bloody-Long-Maternity-Leave. Hello, Monday-till-Friday 8am-4pm at the office.


I’m back at work! Why, yes. Yes, I do miss my son. But actually those who miss him more than I do are Miss Right Boobs and Miss Left Boobs. I am still breastfeeding and so every lunch time, I rush back to my son to release the throbbing OH MY GOD WHY MUST IT BE SO PAINFUL boobs. I cannot pump in the office. The idea itself makes me more uncomfortable than shaking hands with a baboon. Where to pump? In the toilet? In the pantry? Want my milk with that tea? I was told there’s a nursing room in office building somewhere but still… A-w-k-w-a-r-d.

So, work. It’s so good to be back. For 3 months I was a full time housewife and that was when I realized, that role is definitely NOT my calling. No offence to those housewives reading this now. It’s not you. It’s me. Contrary to what people belief and for reason I cannot mention here, I love my job. My job gives me the kind of adrenaline rush that I only get when I jab myself with unicorn’s blood.

Aside from that, I can FINALLY wear nice clothes. At home, I looked like an abused mental patient drab in pajamas 24 hours. I didn’t bother to dress and look my best because I know, as a walking talking leaking boob machine, I will eventually stain my front blouse/shirt and my son thinks my shoulders are rubber toys to be gnawed and drooled on. Oh I tried to look nice for my husband but 5 minutes after Hurricane Kaisan attack… Haih! Don’t worry. I assure you I have been verbally shredded by all my female friends about me being so homeless looking.

Only when I go to work that I put some effort to my look. Note the word SOME. As I mentioned previously, I can’t afford to spend too much time dressing up, putting on makeup and such. Besides, all my work clothes STILL too small for me and all my maternity clothes are TOO BIG. Nothing kills my confidence faster than looking in my cupboard and realizes I can only wear towels to work. And what’s worst: I hate shopping here. I want to shop elsewhere. Like maybe, Johor’s new mall? [HINT][HINT]

Anyway, being a realist, this excitement will eventually wears off. I just hope it’s not too soon. In the meantime, I’m going to celebrate this return to the zombie land by buying tons of breast pads. 

Then clean my desk. But first, breast pads.





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