My 2011 in retrospect:
I won’t say my 2011 were a great awesomepossum year. Neither was it so terrible, it scarred me for life.
It was an okay year. A year where many lessons were learnt and many factors; good and bad, achievement and failure, happened beyond my control.
In 2011, I came up with 3 resolutions, which were:
1. Start saving more money and spend wisely and carefully.
2. Start an exercise regime
3. Cook at home more and eat out less
Those 3 were realistic and achievable goals but due to circumstances NOT in my control, my goals were deviated and broken into many pieces of tiny successes.
1. Start saving more money and spend wisely and carefully.
Achievement: I did started saving. For the first time in my life, I invested my money in trustworthy investment schemes and insurance but with much trepidation of what-ifs. So far, Alhamdulillah, all my studies, reading and asking about investment is paying off and reaping the rewards is a satisfaction of its own.
Circumstances beyond my control, which resulted in failure: Moving to a new house, getting ready for a baby, and many more, I was spending more than I intended. As a result, I was collecting more debts than not.
Circumstances beyond my control, which resulted in achievement: Trice last year I received unexpected windfall. From there, I managed to settle 90% of my debts. Another 10% will be brought forward this year and to be paid off as soon as I can.
2. Start an exercise regime
Failure: I registered as a gym member at a local gym and bought a pair of jogging shoes early last year to replace my old ones. Until now, the shoes are still in a box, unused and dust free while the Mister went to the gym alone.
Circumstances beyond my control, which resulted in failure: I had cyst surgery early last year and had to rest a lot.
Circumstances beyond my control, which resulted in achievement: A month or two after the surgery, I got pregnant and due to my fragile state, the only exercise I managed to do was walking to a mall to shop for baby stuff.
3. Cook at home more and eat out less
Achievement: “Balqiz got her groove back!” In cooking I mean.
Circumstances beyond my control, which resulted in failure, AND achievement all at the same time: In my first trimester, we eat out more than not. I couldn’t cook due to the smell that brought forth the need to hurl the content in my stomach. And being such a picky eater at that stage was a nightmare for both the mister and I. Thinking of what to eat took more than 3 hours and another 1 hour to think of where to find such food. Sometimes the mister had to drive out past midnight just to get me food that I suddenly MUST eat there and then. Thank God it lasted for three months. Starting my second trimester until now, I was consumed by the need to cook EVERYTHING UNDER SUN because my appetite to eat was ginormous and only my own cooking can satisfy my epicure. As I gain weight due to my pregnancy, the mister gained too; due to my cooking.
2012
I don’t have any resolution or goals this year. After so much had happened last year, main lesson learned was that a goal that is realistic, within my power and achievable could be unrealistic, beyond my power and unachievable all at the same time.
This 2012, I expect it’s going to be a roller coaster ride. I will be a mother in less than a month. I don’t know what kind of mother I will be. I hope I will be a smashing success one. I will still work full time and study part time. I don’t know how I will juggle all that but with a supporting, understanding and helpful husband, I will manage. I won’t deny that there will be a time I will break down and calling it quits but I went through worst. God tested me more than few times with worst circumstances before and I came out alive and kicking. So if I do fall, I will rise up again because I am well trained to endure hardship [just don’t throw hand grenades at me coz I will still blow up and die]
I will still be as open and as blunt as ever. Nothing will change that no matter if no one likes it or can accept it. Fine by me [munch on peanuts] I didn’t come all the way from hell to put up with measly ingrates with too much drama and excess baggage. I am honest to bits, transparent as a glass and not a hypocrite like you.
"If everything I do is all about you, then you are biting off more than you can chew." ~Balqiz
I will still blog and take photo even when I know it won’t be as often as before. My blog is my form of therapy and at the same time, a diary. I made it public so that my friends scattering all over the world can check in on my updates (I rarely update my Facebook) and I will still keep it in public viewing mode. Some post which is TMI or too sensitive for the pseudo religious or narrow-minded people will be blocked and only with password given by me that you can view it. Not everyone will get the password so if you are one of the rejected few, I’m sorry. It is MY VERY MUCH intention to not let you read it because I say so.
To my loyal readers (even to those haters), thank you! Your support through your comments, your emails and your friendship, believe or not, has given me all the motivation I need to go on even when there are times I feel like quitting or too lazy or busy.
When ask, I still don’t know what this blog represent to the society we are living. I am not blogging about specific niche topic, nor am I educating nor talking about latest issues of the world. I am just babbling about my day-to-day life and I guess getting a glimpse of what I go through is what makes this blog a good leisure read without having to think waaaaay too much.
Till then, HAPPY NEW YEAR and May we live to see 2013 and more!
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