Brain? What brain?


I had a brain. Once. Then I become a mom and I lost it somewhere among my son’s dirty diapers and my 961 shirts that has been puked on.

If you’re a mom (especially a new mom) maybe you can relate to some of the brainless incidents that I experienced lately. Behold; MOMMY BRAIN SYNDROME:

1. Had a major cardiac arrest when I went into the room and stared at my son’s empty crib. OH MY GOD WHERE IS MY BABY?! Oh wait. I took him out a minute ago to put him in his playpen.

2. [Telephone conversation]

Me: “Mom, what time are you coming over?”
Husband: “Erm… Baby? This is me…”
Me: “Huh? What the…? Why are you answering mom’s phone?”
Husband: “Errr… You called MY phone”
Me: “Really?” [Check the number dialed] “HOLY MOTHER OF $%#@!”
Husband: “Baby, this is 6th times in a week you accidentally called me...”

3. Went into the kitchen, opened the fridge and stared at it for 5 minutes and have no clue what I was looking for.

4. I washed Kaisan’s bottles FOUR TIMES because each time after I finished washing it, I asked myself, “Did I wash this already?” and washed it again. Repeat that four times. FOUR TIMES.

5. Waited half an hour for the rice to cook only to realize I didn’t turn on the rice cooker’s switch.

6. I turned the house upside down looking for my phone when the entire time, the phone was in my hand.

7. I was asked to check my email at 8am and as I switched on my computer, I tried using the aircond’s remote as the mouse. I thought the sensor gone fuck and was cursing the entire time that I have to buy a new mouse.


8. [Driving with my pregnant sister]

“Why are we at the fish market? Aren’t we supposed to go to the night market?”
“I want to get a toilet mat”
“Here? At a FISH MARKET?”
“HOLY MOTHER OF!!!” [Turned car around and drove to the night market]
“Wait a minute. It’s 10am. The night market opens at 6pm!”
“HOLY MOTHER OF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

9. Few nights ago, I was asked by the Mister to cook roasted chicken. When I was serving, he asked, “I thought you’re making me roasted chicken…?” Huh? I MADE HIM FRIED CHICKEN INSTEAD I DON’T EVEN!

And the crown jewels of all:

10. I washed my face with contact lens solution because I thought it was my facial foam.








9 Comments:

LadyBird said...

BABO syndrome ya woman hahahaha...

realist me said...

similarity with me (mother of two), no 2,3,5,6..erk..okay..not as many as that..but couple of times i sent my 2++y.o Lissa to nursery which is 30min drive from home knowing that i didn't brought her bag. It took me 1hr to patah balik..huhu..anyway, we're just normal ordinary mum.too many things in our minds. haha..

apijah said...

Totally me! apuuuuu

Anonymous said...

Bukan babo, overstressed!! That's a mother's syndrome!! How do you think a mother can manage 5 kids? You need time for yourself, so take it easy..and relax..A lot of changes expected when you become a mother, you will discover what a handful of responsibilites and commitments a mother have, and above all, the efforts and sacrifices, but don't worry, Motherhood comes easy as you go along... just relax.

Anonymous said...

Bahahahahaha..

On the other hand.. yeah take time to destressed okay. You got too much in your hands. -kutasia-

grace r said...

Hahahahahaha!!! Im sorry to say Balqiz, this is beyond hilarious. Made my day!

Balqiz said...

(^_^)

rouselle g said...

you funny, funny woman! ;) you remind me of my sister! she blames the anesthesia for her forgetfulness. i don't know if it's true. but i guess it is. :)

lv said...

hahahahaha!!!! this is just hillarious!! apuuuu!! although i am not married yet but i sometimes did some of the things like these. used to wanted to brush my teeth using my facial foam and threw my sock into the rubbish bin instead of the laundy basket! how that?! lol!! have a nice day, u!

 

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